After forcing me to attend weigh****chers as a teenager, and the eventual failure I had with losing weight, my mother never badgered me again about weight loss. I think maybe it is because she felt some level of guilt for my poor diet. Sometimes when she came to pick me up from WW meetings, she would be in the car with my siblings eating Little Debbies. I know she did the best she could, but she is very overweight herself, so healthy food wasn’t a popular option in our household.
I’m 32 years old now. This past year, my mom drove me to the ER because I was in severe pain due to a kidney stone. I was in a state of sheer agony, nearly screaming because I hurt so badly. The nurse in triage asked my weight instead of having me get on the scale. When I said “400 pounds,” the look on my mother’s face is one I will never forget. Even in the midst of the situation I was in, I felt the deepest, burning shame of my entire life. Since this time, my mother has been badgering me about my weight again. I feel like she is ruminating on it, now that she has heard my “number.” It’s putting a strain on our relationship, because I feel like I’m being judged now when I am around her, whereas before, I was always close to my mom.
I can tell you that there are absolutely no “right words” my mom could use to encourage me to lose weight. I already know that I am fat. I know the health risks. There is absolutely nothing new she can tell me about obesity. I just want my mom to be my mom and love me in whatever shape and size I come in. Let the doctors be my source of medical advice. Let the critics tell me everything that’s wrong with me. I just want my mom to be mom.
God, I need help.. Both my adult kids are obese, son is 6’2 260 lbs. age 37 daughter is 5’4 230 lbs……., every time i bring up to my daughter about losing weight, She sez she will never have weight loss surgery because she see’s my life after weight loss surgery, espically after …
